The Paper Chains That Bind Us
by Quaver Ava
Summary: Where I take your characters and turn them into little brats. Staring Brink and Keetch from The Chains That Bind Us and about everyone else's characters too. So do you know what that means yall? We're gonna learn about teamwork and being nice! Yaaay!
1. Chapter 1

**Dissing Disclaimers: I declare all these characters in this story to be mine! Yes, forget disclaimers, these characters are now all mine, mine I say mine! Well except for Lucy, she's some guy's chick that shouldn't be in charge of a room full of dibbuns, having been the leader of the DAB in Jordan's stories and all. **

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Lucy walked into the room and clapped her paws together. "OK class, today we're going to learn about teamwork!"

The class looked up from their many activities at the grown squirrel, each and every face holding a small frown. Brink raised his paw. "Dah weh geht teh choose who naht teh beh pahrtner'd wi't?"

Lucy smiled brightly at the little rascal. "Why of course! When I was your age I always got to choose who I didn't want to be with. So Brink, choose away!"

The little otter pointed his small paw across the room directly at a white fox kit named Keetch. "Keehch, ah dahn't like 'im."

Lucy put a paw to her mouth in mock shock. "Why Brink, why not? I've seen you and him play with each other perfectly fine before?"

"Cause he stupihd ahn' trihpped meh ihn tahg!" Brink huffed, folding his arms over his chest.

"Well now, that's not a very nice thing to say, calling him stupid." Lucy scolded the little otter before turning to face the snow fox. "And you little rascal, is it true that your tripped him in tag?"

Keetch looked side to side before sucking in his lips. "I didn't do nah such thing!" He lied.

Lucy raised an eye brow at the little kit. "Really? Do I need to get Urthblood in here to deal with you? Nobeasts likes a lair, and lying is really bad."

All eyes in the room grew twice their size at the mention of the abbey's resident badger. Keetch gave in and confessed, but not without defense. "I did trip 'im, I did, I did! But I was gonna get tagged if I didn't, yah understand Miss Lucy?"

The squirrel nodded her head in understandingness. "I do understand, I do. I understand that you tripped him so you wouldn't get tagged. If you knew what teamwork was you two might have been able to get away together. However, you don't know what teamwork is, and today we're going to learn that. Brink, Keetch, you two will be paired up for today's games!"

Both young'uns made to protest but Lucy held up her paw. "Ahem, Urthblood." She threatened, quieting the two before they could begin their disruptive and loud protests. "To demonstrate teamwork today class," The teacher began, turning to her whole group of dibbuns. "I will pair each and everyone of you with a partner and shackle paper chains to you. This paper chains will keep you together and make you work as a team to complete today's games. If you break the paper chains you and your partner will be taken out of the games and set in time out for the rest of the day. So remember, work as a team and we'll all have fun!" She finished, clapping her hands together excitedly.

Little eyes blinked at her blankly. Lucy narrowed her eyes at them all before muttering the dreaded name. "Urthblood..." And then the class began to cheer and jump up and down excitedly, happy to be learning about teamwork that day!

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**OK so here's the gist of it for right now. I'll be updating this with short chapters in a simple to read style. This story is meant for the pure laughs and not to offend anyone and their characters. If you want to get your characters in the story point me out to your fanfic and I'll see what I can do. But for right now I'll just stick with characters from my favorite stories. Brink and Keetch are Jade's characters from The Chains That Bind Us, and Urthblood is obviously from the Urthblood saga by Highwing. Lucy is of course mine. Do I have permission you ask? **

**No, not really, but it's easier to ask for forgiveness than it is permission. So yeah, yall don't mind do ya? XD **


	2. Chapter 2

**Dissing Disclaimers: I will be selling this story on ****Buy Crap N ' Stuff Like **. All profits will go to me, me, and well me. Oh sorry? What's that? I'm not allowed to do that? No, I'm pretty sure I am. Seeing as how all these characters and places are well, mine. Then why FanFiction? Would yall shut up, it's mine I say and ain't nothin' ya can do to change that! 

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Somehow, in some miraculous way, Lucy managed to put the chains on Brink and Keetch. They lightly pulled at it, testing its durability and distance. The more distance the better. They had a whopping three feet to work with! Woo! Brink was the first to complain. "Iht's to tihght." He lisped, rubbing at where the paper chaffed at his fur just slightly.

Lucy patted his little head and smiled at him warmly. "I can always get some real chains for you Brink. And take my word of advice, they're not comfortable. Now, skat while I fix these other kiddies with the oh so torturous chains of _paper_."

The two little maggots grumbled as they walked away, the maximum distance between them. Lucy then proceeded to put chains to the rest of the children. After a little while she came to the end of the line of one lone otter cub. The squirrel teacher, or slaver driver however you wanna look at her, frowned at the dibbun. "Nye, where is Thekka?"

The little girl looked at her pink painted claws. "I don't keep track of losers." She said snobbishly.

Lucy narrowed her eyes at the otter cub. "She's your sister…"

Nye looked up to Lucy. "Nahh uuhh, she's adopted. I'm a weasel, Orch's a weasel, but she's a _fox_. Foxes are like, so last season. Weasel and ferrets are now in."

The teacher facepalmed. _Jordan, I'm not being paid enough for this… _(Bribe her.) "OK my little princess; I'll give you some Shrimp N' Hotroot Soup if you get your sister and play the games today. Better yet I'll cook you a whole pot of it if you win the games today."

The little otter's eyes grew twice their size. "I'll be right back!" She exclaimed before zooming off screen, then reappeared a moment later with a struggling vixen in tow. "I got her, chain us before she gets away!"

Lucy quickly chained the two together. Thekka cired out, "Noooohoohoo!" as she pulled against the paper chain with all her might. Amazingly enough it didn't break. "I shouldn't be here; I need to be with mommy! Oh mommy, save me from this cruel place, oh please save me!"

(Ikeda, I'll give you a cookie to let her suffer.)

Lucy walked away to set up the first game, leaving the two 'sisters' alone. Nye turned to Thekka and roughly poked the kit in the chest. "OK, listen here you little cry baby, we're going to win today's games, and you're going to learn to stand up for yourself. If you don't I'll be getting a new scarf and it's gonna be your fluffy little tail!"

Thekka whimpered under her sister's glare. "Y-yes Princess Nye."

Nye smiled sweetly at her. "OK, now, like, stop pulling on the chain, or like I'll slap you."

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**Short but funny chapters are the way to go for this story. Basically one page updates. So, Nye the little otter cub is from The Reverse Taggerung Effect by SaraaLuna, and Thekka is of course from Thekka by Ikeda Rose. I actually got permission, denied her permission, and said I stole her character instead. ;P**

**There's another version of this chapter where Pedobear drives up at a window in an ice-cream truck and Lucy orders a 'vixen in a can' and out pops Thekka! Yeah… It was early in the morning. XD**


	3. Chapter 3

**Dissing Disclaimers: You see those author notes at the bottom saying where the characters come from? Yeah, don't listen to that person. He's some guy named Jordan and has no life! No life I say! Instead you should listen to me, an unnamed person on the internet who claims all these characters and settings to be mine. Yes, they're mine and you should totally ignore that Jordan guy down there…**

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You could say that Rinner was adapt at weaseling around; he was a weasel you know. His special talent, matter-oh-factly, was getting the girls! Or that is, cornering them and spreading the horrid disease called… Cooties! Yes, Rinner had cooties and it was the worst case since that one Power Puff Girl episode. (Just shut up…)

Rinner's partner was thankfully another boy. Unfortunately for the weasel it was a silver furred ferret named Eyeshine, the same ferret who was immune to cooties. Especially after he had his fiasco with a little squirrel maiden named Petula, the second worst case of cooties ever to walk the earth. No one knew what exactly Eyeshine had done to the love stricken girl, but in the end she had to be taken away to the mental ward where all the other Marry Sues, er, I mean, crazies went! (Lucy visits Tava often)

(Tava: I'm not a Marry Sue!)  
(Me: Tava, you'll always be my little Marry Sue.)  
(Tava: *bleep* Where's my shoes, I need to smack this *bleep* so hard.)  
(Me: And back to the story!)

Rinner and Eyeshine walked over to some girls with bright smiles on their faces. Well, one was smiling and the other was smirking at what was about to take place. Rinner came up to the little otter girl named Nye and leaned against the wall. "So babe, I see you're stuck with your sister for today's games."

Nye turned to the weasel with a raised eyebrow. "Excuuuse me, but are you taalking-" The otter shifted her gaze left and right before leaning in a little bit. "To like me?" She finished.

Rinner nodded his head, a cocky grin on his face. "Yeah babe, I am."

Thekka surprisingly was the one to speak up. "I don't think she's really interested in you Rinner…" The fox ducked and whimpered as her 'sister' snapped a glare at her.

Turning back to the flirtatious weasel Nye smiled at him. "I'm like, not interested, and you're a weasel, so go weasel off."

Eyeshine snickered as his partner gave a mock hurt expression. "But babe, I'm so totally into otters! And I like what I see."

Nye rolled her eyes as she checked her pink nails again, wondering if she could get away with a little bit of fowl play during the games, she might be able to sneak in a smack to the weasel's head. "Get to the point cootie boy." She drawled in a bored tone.

"I wanna make a deal with you." Rinner declared.

"And that would be?" Nye said, looking up to the weasel, her interest perked.

"Me and my partner here will help you win today's games, cheat for you baby, if you agree to be my girl, at least for a day."

Nye slowly blinked at the weasel, surprised that such a dummy could make up such a scheme. Here, right in front of her was a pair willing to help her get to that pot of ShrimpN'Hotroot soup, and all it would coast her would be a day of being the cootie boy's girl. She mildly thought on how dangerous spending that much time with him could be, but in the end it all came back to ShrimpN'Hotroot soup! A whole freaking pot! She _was_ an otter after all. "Deal." She declared, sticking out her hand.

Rinner spat in his hand and clasped with Nye's, smiling at her disgusted face. "It's settled than, we're now partners in crime!"

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**This chapter had a few more paragraphs in it than I liked, but it was still all pretty funny. The next chapter will bring us back to Brink and Keetch. But anyways I give you Rinner from a Weasel's Tale in Mossflower by FerretWARLORD, and Eyeshine from Cullin' of the Fold by Laburnum Steelfang. Go read both their stories, they're pretty funny. **

**Oh and that guy up there, yeah, I'm not quite sure why he's giving out my name, but it's really starting to bug me. How would yall suggest I go about this small issue? :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**Dissing Disclaimers: The following characters are the property of me and thus belong to me. You are not allowed to use them in any way, shape, or form. What's that? They're not mine and I'm using them without permission? What are you talking about, I don't even write the following story! Oh, wait, I mean, no, I-, I do write it and it's mine! Yeah, this whole story is mine, all mine! Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine…**

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All the abbey's dibbuns and brats were taken out onto the lawns where they would play some of their games. Lucy smiled as she instructed all her tiny angels into a line. "OK class, the first game we're going to play today is a little race to warm you up and get you excited!"

The whole group of tiny folk looked at her blankly. She narrowed her eyes before raising a sign that read, "Urthblood…" And then the class all jumped and clapped and cheered at the idea of a race with each other.

"So class, here are the rules, no kicking, no punching, no grabbing, no tackling, no spitting, no throwing, no tripping, and generally play nice. If I see any of you cheating I will pull you aside and do an Urthblood all over your little tails. Now, how 'bout we all line up nice like, that's good, and, one, two, 3! Gogogo!"

And they were off! All racing to the flag that stood a long ways off. Well, all except for two little cubs who were wrestling on the ground and pulling at each other's fur. Lucy looked onto the scene of Keetch and Brink breaking about every rule she had just given, even the spitting one where Keetch got on top of Brink and hung a loogie over the little otter as he screamed.

The teacher walked over to the two and roughly picked Keetch up by the collar, the little fox sucking in his saliva and quickly making a face. "I didn't do it, he's the one who was gonna spit on me fir-ow!" He yelped as Brink jumped up from his spot on the ground and chumped his little chopper's onto the fox's leg. Lucy used one of her legs to shove Brink away, but the little otter was determined to beat on the fox.

And then she found herself in a position where she was holding back Keetch from trying to get at the otter. The only thing that made it all worse was that she only had three feet of distance to work with as the paper chain kept the two together. Finally the squirrel screamed. "EEEENNNNNOOOOOOOUUUGGGHHHHHH HH!"""""""

Both dibbuns stopped and looked up at her with wide eyes. Lucy spoke again as calm as she could. "Brink, I will make the same deal with you as I made with Nye and that I will give you a whole pot of ShrimpN'Hotroot soup if you win today's games. BUT, you and Keetch must play nice with each other and follow the rules!"

The little otter's eyes grew five times their size, (which is a bit creepy if you really think about it), before he hauled Keetch up and zoomed down the lawn after the others.

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**About a hundred words shorter that the other chapters but this starts the first game of this fantastic day of games. It's a race and Brink and Keetch are behind. However, they'll quickly catch that you can be sure of! Oh and no characters stolen today. :\**


	5. Chapter 5

**Dissing Disclaimers: The characters in this story are mine. The pennames that go with these characters are also mine. You see, I've got several accounts for different styles and personalities, so they're all mine. The stories that these characters come from are 100.314…% mine. Most notably Chains, Reverse, and the Redwall series are mine! **

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Brink and Keetch were running at a break neck speed after the other children. The otter driven by the mad addiction all otters had to shrimp and hotroots put together in a soup and the fox simply trying to keep up with his fellow partner and enemy. Soon enough they also came across obstacles, passing by children that were thrown into a heap and groaning.

Finally Keetch couldn't take it anymore and pulled at Brink's chain. The paper stretched for a little bit before the otter was slung back into his foxie partner. "Hey, wha' gihves!" Brink protested, folding his arms over his chest at being pulled to a halt.

Keetch pointed to a downed pair of children, one of the two girls crying over getting hit with a mud bomb by Eyeshine. Brink raised his eyebrow at his cousin. Tears streamed down Miria's little face at being, just, so, dirty.

Keetch pulled Brink over to the two girls. Miria's partner was covered completely in mud and face first into the dirt, the only thing that showed her species was her cat tail. "Quick Brink, help me get 'er tears so we can use evil magic to get to the flag!"

Miria looked at the fox and cried again, more tears streaming down her cute little muddy face. "You-you want to steal my tears? Noo, I won't let you take my tears!" The girl whimpered as she tried to crawl away, but her feline and unconscious friend kept her in place. "Stay away from me you creee-EEEK!"

Keetch then jumped the little girl, the two turning into a cloud of dust, stars, limbs, and 'ow's'. Finally, after a long battle that lasted five seconds, the fox returned to his partner who had stood back with his small arms crossed over his chest. Miria was left with dizzy swirls in her eyes from getting beat up by the evil little boy. Keetch gave Brink a smirk before raising a little bottle with a few drops of tears in it above his head and said, "I give t'is sacrifice of a wimp's tears!"

Brink blinked as nothing happened, Keetch just standing there with a bottle over his head. "Ya an' idihot…" he said before turning from the fox and getting ready to pull the other boy along by his arm. Suddenly a bolt of red lightly zapped behind him and he had to blink twice before looking back again. There, next to Keetch, was the abbot, Martin the Warrior.

Keetch's mouth lightly dropped as he looked on at the warrior mouse, fitted with chainmail armor and a habbit to fit over it all. The ghostly figured looked down at him with two evil eyes before blinking and making a face, his regular and kind eyes returning. "Hey, when I took on part time demon work I didn't think I'd be summoned by any Redwaller."

Keetch's mouth was still dropped. So was Brinks. Oh and Miria the wimp stopped crying. "Well, if you little tights don't need _The Dark Warrior_, I'll be on my way to have some tea."

Brink turned to the fox and growled at the scruffy little boy. "You summoned MARTIN?!" He yelled, outraged. The abbot was the last person they needed in cheating in a race!

Keetch shook his head, quickly catching his sense and pointing off to the flag. "We need to be taken there!" And then he added, "Now!" as Brink approached him dangerously.

Martin nodded his head before snapping his fingers. The two boys and two girls where there one moment, and gone the next, appearing fifteen feet away… Keetch looked at martin. "Hey, what gibs!"

Martin lightly chucked as his eyes turned evil again. "A few drops of wimp's tears won't get you very far my boy. Try something better, perhaps a sacrifice of something precious and dear next time. 'Till then, cheerio and have fun!" And Martin was gone in a zap of red lighting.

"Psh!" Was the last thing Keetch said before Brink tackled him…

And Miria cried some more.

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**Hey there fellow authors and readers, how's it been? I've started a part time job, and I'm working on some original writing, so updates a little slower than usual. Anyways if you haven't heard yet, which you should have by now, Jade is back and she's got a new story, The Blood Between Us. Miria is actually one of her new characters that's featured in this chapter. She's been turned around from rough and tough easily annoyed to an annoying wimp herself. Oh, and then there's Martin. :P **

**Quaver**


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